Hello Everyone,
October 18th would have been my 37th wedding anniversary and I don't think I will ever forget that date, because in 1987 it was one of the most amazing days of my life! At 23 years young, I married the love of my life, the man who I thought knew me better then anyone else, and the person who I committed to spend the rest of my life with...until we both realized that love would never be enough to keep our marriage healthy!
Because we didn’t know we were a neurodiverse couple, didn't understand our childhood wounds, and had such different expectations for what communication, conflict and repair, and emotional reciprocity should look like in a marriage, we both caused each other SO much unintentional hurt and pain.
Since starting Neurodiverse Love in 2020, I have met, interviewed, or coached hundreds of individuals and couples from all over the world. Whether their relationship has ended, or they have transformed their view of each other and begun a new journey together, almost all of the individuals and couples I have met wish they had known they were in a mixed neurotype relationship earlier. I repeatedly hear how much understanding their own neurology and their partner’s could have made a big difference in the way they treated themselves and each other, and this knowledge could have also helped reduce the amount of "unintentional hurt and pain" they caused each other.
Now, through the Neurodiverse Love documentary, the stories that will be shared by the couples, therapists and coaches in this film, have the opportunity to change neurodiverse relationships forever! By sharing both the positive possibilities and the challenging chaos that these couples have experienced, as well as the way in which the coaches and therapists have helped couples work through their differences, this documentary will bring light to a world few people understand!
None of us are guaranteed a successful life or a healthy, romantic relationship, however, with increased knowledge, better understanding, and the capacity to give the people we care about grace and treat ourselves and our partners with compassion we can create healthier neurodiverse relationships (and families).
However, in order to make this documentary a reality I need your help! If you want to be a part of the community that is supporting the Neurodiverse Love documentary I hope you will contribute today. If each of you reading this newsletter contributed $25 we would have the funds we need for production and distribution of the film. Everyone who contributes will be listed on my website, however those of you who contribute $100 or more will be listed in the credits of the film and will also receive a code to be able to access all the items in my shop for free!
Click below on the amount that you can contribute!
Thank you SO much for supporting this important project!
Workshop Recording and Separation Guide Available
If you missed the workshop I co-facilitated with Shawna and Kevin Meek, "Navigating Healthy Separation for Neurodiverse Couples" you can buy unlimited access to both the "audio only " and "video" recording , as well as the Separation Plan Guide that was developed by Shawna.
Shawna and Kevin Meek have been guests on the Neurodiverse Love podcast and their episode is one of my most downloaded episodes of all time! They have separated, divorced, and remarried and have learned SO much since discovering they are a neurodiverse couple (Kevin discovered he is Autistic at 50).
During the workshop, we share our own lived experiences and also help guide neurodiverse couples in developing a structured and clear plan to support the relationship, as well as each partner's needs. I am 100% sure that the information provided in this workshop would have greatly reduced the confusion, unintentional hurt and emotional ups and downs my ex and I experienced when we separated in 2016!
Click here if you would like to buy access to the workshop and the Separation Plan Guide today!
NEW BOOK BY DR. BRONWYN WILSON
I am so happy to share that my friend, colleague and previous guest co-host on the Neurodiverse Love podcast, Dr. Bronwyn Wilson, has published her 2nd book in her 3 book series titled "Have We Gone Nuts" This book is subtitled: The Family, Friend and Clinician's Guide to Neurodiverse (Autistic-Neurotypical) Relationships. Bron's book is excellent and is based on the research she has done with 400 individuals and couples in neurodiverse relationships. I highly recommend both of her books and they are now available on Amazon, so I hope you will order them both today.
NEURODIVERGENT CONNECTIONS YOUTUBE CHANNEL
Check out the next epsiode of the new "Neurodivergent Connections" YouTube channel that I co-facilitate with Greg Fuqua, LMHC and Scott Simpson. During this episode we talk about alexythymia and sensory differences and I hope you find the information we share helpful.
SHORT TERM COACHING WITH MONA
If you are interested in short term coaching (up to 4 sessions) with me I have a few spots opening up for non-autistic individuals or neurodiverse couples. Each session will focus on the challenging issues that have become patterns in your life and we will work together to understand what you can do invidually or as a couple to create positive change. If you would like to learn helpful strategies and tools that can be used to have a healthier life and relationship, please feel free to email me at neurodiverselove4u@gmail.com. My fee is $121/hr and $175 for 90 minutes.
With gratitude,
Mona Kay, MSW, Ph.D.
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